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Haroldhenge: A Mecca for Hippies.
Residents of the village have opened their arms, if not nostrils, to a swathe of visitors who have descended on the village. With Harold’s own Stonehenge finally completed, hundreds of Druids, Pagans,...
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Crock of Gold was a Crock of Disappointment.
Lula-Belle is currently on vacation in the Maldives. After the death of local businessman Brendon McDonald in March of this year, many villagers assumed that his estate would bequeath the bulk of Mr...
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New Pool Users Left ‘Bummed Out’.
Is it a chocolate log? The gala opening of Dunstable’s new multi-million pound swimming and leisure complex hit a bum note yesterday, after a patron took ‘bombing the pool’ literally. Just moments...
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Shit hits the fan over stick of poo
Bridge Over Troubled Water Another village tradition was flushed away yesterday, as the Health and Safety Executive pulled the plug on Harold’s annual poo-sticks competition. There were angry scenes in...
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‘Butter up your elderly relatives in time for Christmas’, says Prince Charles
I suppose an OBE’s out of the question, then? Following the suggestion by Princess Anne that Britons should eat horsemeat to improve the animals’ quality of life, another member of the Royal Family has...
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The Beast of Harold (an unsolved mystery)
Beast of Harold (artist’s impression) Villagers on the outskirts of Harold spoke yesterday of their fear and horror after numerous sightings of a mysterious beast were reported. Residents spoke of...
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Man admits ‘I haven’t got a clue what the World Cup’s about’
“So one ball starts in the middle but then what happens to the quaffle and the bludgers?” Despite the almost world wide interest and obsession with the World Cup, a Harold man today admitted he has...
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Grab a copy of the i-Spy Bites and Stings of Scotland!
Thinking of hitting the Highlands this summer? Keep the kids entertained on those long, boring holidays with a copy of the i-Spy Bites and Stings of Scotland! Educational and cheap, it’s the ideal sop...
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Thatcher rises from grave to help save Union
Ironically, it’s the only union she didn’t try to break. In a dramatic (and slightly gruesome) turn of events, former UK Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher has risen from the dead to wade into the battle...
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‘Emotional’ Queen ‘goes on a brenda’
Queen slurred the National Anthem, before sicking on a corgi. The Queen has finally been subdued and arrested after a drunken rampage in Central London which left eyewitnesses both appalled at the...
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